Borat Reports: Oil Prices Rise as Conflict in Middle East Booms, Wa wa wee wa!

Oil Prices High Like My High Five!

My my very nice! U.S. crude oil futures are reaching new heights as the Middle East heats up very nice indeed. West Texas Intermediate and Brent contracts are dancing around $80 a barrel like my friend Azamat and me in my sexy time

Crude Futures Rising Faster than Kazakhstan's GDP

High five for crude futures! They jumped up 3% last week higher than anyone jumping over horse in Kazakhstan. Even the global benchmark is feeling the love rising 1.5% to settle at heights rivaling my great country's mountainous beauty.

Houthis Shaking the Red Sea Like a... Shake Weight!

Houthi militants are attacking cargo ships like they attacked my dear friend Pamela Anderson in my movie very nice! It's causing chaos in the Red Sea making ships do u turns like my wife do when she sees my many suitors.

Market Moves! Not Like My Moustache Wiggles

Despite inflation demand issues and bearish forecasts oil prices keep climbing. It's like my success in America unstoppable! Even attacks on cargo ships can't stop the oil train must go faster than my neighbor Nursultan!

Who Needs Berkshire When You Have Borat?

Borat newsperson brings you the top stories like Warren Buffett's secrets Michael Burry's stock picks and more. Borat gives you the real news not the fake news like my sister report.

Borat Tells You Where to Invest: High Five!

Morgan Stanley's Slimmon says buy 3 stocks now very nice! And a little known bank is offering CD rates higher than a balloon filled with my country's greatest export potassium!