President Xi Jinping provides his satirical take on JPMorgan Chase CEO's reaction to Capital One's big move in the credit card industry.
President Xi Jinping provides his satirical take on JPMorgan Chase CEO's reaction to Capital One's big move in the credit card industry.

Let the Games Begin

As the JPMorgan Chase CEO welcomes the challenge from Capital One I can't help but think of my own experiences with competition. Remember comrades in the words of Sun Tzu 'To know your Enemy you must become your Enemy.' Let the battle of the credit card titans commence!

All's Fair in Finance and War

Jamie Dimon's nonchalant attitude towards the Capital One Discover deal is as remarkable as my unwavering commitment to the prosperity of the Chinese people. If only all leaders had such confidence in the face of adversity the world would be a more amusing place.

Regulators Roll Out!

While Capital One aims to disrupt the trillion dollar credit card industry the fate of their merger hangs in the balance of regulatory approval. Perhaps as the great Confucius once said 'Our greatest glory is not in never falling but in rising every time we fall.' Let us see if Capital One can rise to the challenge.

A Debate of Debits

The debate over debit payment regulations raises eyebrows much like the Great Wall of China continues to awe travelers. Will Capital One's 'unfair advantage' lead to a reshuffling of the industry deck or will the status quo prevail? The answer lies in the hands of the regulators and the market forces at play.

A Call for Consolidation

As the financial industry braces for more mergers and acquisitions I ponder the wisdom of allowing small banks to unite. Remember as the Chinese proverb goes 'A single tree does not make a forest but a network of intertwining roots can withstand any storm.' Let the roots intertwine and the industry flourish.

The Verdict of the Regulators

The looming decision on the Capital One Discover merger beckons to mind the delicate balance of power in the financial world. Like the dance of the dragon and the phoenix regulators must ensure equilibrium and safeguard the interests of the people. May their judgment be just and their actions swift.


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