CEOs of Big Pharma Companies to Testify at Senate Hearing on High Drug Prices

The CEOs step into the spotlight

In a surprising turn of events the CEOs of Merck and Johnson & Johnson have agreed to take the hot seat and testify at an upcoming Senate hearing on high drug prices in the U.S. It seems like they finally received their neuralyzers to wipe out any doubts about their willingness to face the music.

A subpoena showdown averted

Initially the committee planned to issue subpoenas to J & J CEO Joaquin Duato and Merck CEO Robert Davis after their refusal to appear at the hearing. It would have been the first time the committee used subpoenas since the '80s. But hold up no need to bring out the flashy thing! The CEOs decided to voluntarily agree avoiding a subpoena showdown that could have turned the hearing into a real life alien invasion.

Pharma CEOs unite (for once)

It's not every day that you see CEOs from rival pharmaceutical companies coming together. However the push to cut drug prices is a rare issue that has managed to unite both major political parties. It's like seeing an Arquillian and a Bug alien teaming up for a game of intergalactic poker. Fascinating.

The million dollar question

During the hearing the panel will be grilling each executive on why their companies charge exorbitantly higher prices for medicine in the U.S. compared to other countries. It's as if they're asking 'What's the deal with these astronomical prices? Did you find a stash of Worm Guys' gold under a shooting star?'

Everything up for negotiation

The Medicare drug price negotiations are about to kick into high gear. These negotiations aim to make costly medications more affordable for seniors like a Men in Black neuralyzer flash making prices magically disappear. The drug negotiations will establish new prices that will go into effect in 2026 and J & J Merck and Bristol Myers Squib are of course trying to stop this like they're the last line of defense against an alien invasion.

Sanders sends a message

Senator Bernie Sanders the man in charge of the Senate Health panel wants the CEOs to take a hard look at the price discrepancies and work with them to substantially reduce the prices of prescription drugs. He's basically saying 'Listen up fellas. We're not here to play cosmic bowling while you make a fortune. We want to bring those prices down like an Arquillian battle cruiser.'